Jul 13, 2016 | By Dannie Marden

Sober at Shakedown: The First Dead and Co. Experience

Personal Addiction Recovery Stories Recovery

Summertime means more than just pool parties and cookouts—for many music fiends, summertime represents concert season, and its on in full force! While we have already made it through Coachella and Bonnarroo, this month also kick-started summer tours for Phish and Dead and Company.

For those who have never been to a Grateful Dead show – or what is now called Dead and Company (featuring heartthrob John Mayer) – the rumors are true. So in full addict fashion, I had to attend one of my first festival type experiences. While it wasn’t a full-blown weekend long festival, let me be the first to tell you it was definitely more than just an open air concert.

What It Looks Like

Upon entering the venue, concert-goers move through the “lot,” which is a large tailgating party where ticket-holders and those in need of a miracle (miracle=ticket) spend most of their time throughout the day. Before the show, many people offered their wares – alcoholic beverages, hits of acid, and various other drugs – to the group of sober individuals that accompanied me to the show. I know what you’re thinking: why go to a place where you KNOW there will be drugs?

Beyond the fantastic music, the atmosphere at a show like this is still very centered around positivity and a free love experience. That being said, drugs and alcohol seemed to be everywhere. So how is it possible to stay sober at Shakedown? A lot easier than you’d expect!

1. Follow the Yellow Balloons

In an earlier article, we covered the Wharf Rats. The Wharf Rats are a group of fans that follow many jam-band type of groups, like Phish, the Grateful Dead, Soundtribe Sector Nine, and Keller Williams. There are other similar groups out there in the live-music world, depending on the venue and the show that you’re seeing. The String Cheese Incident has a similar following of fans, known as the Jellyfish.

These groups like the Wharf Rats and the Jellyfish are made up of sober individuals, who often meet during intermission to have a meeting. These meetings help to share gratitude, struggles during the show, and even give out chips to commemorate clean time! There’s even a website that can help direct you to these sober groups of people, their group name, and what to look for at certain shows in case you need to find some support. If you go to a concert or festival and follow the yellow balloons, you’ll connect with the Wharf Rats group or their information table.

2. Have a Sober Group With You

If you’re going to a festival or concert where enthusiasts are often using substances or alcohol, make sure you bring an army of sober support. Shows can be stressful. Anxiety and discomfort are often associated with environments like this, that are typically branded by drug and alcohol use. But by bringing other clean and sober people with you, you are more apt to stay on the right track. With these supports by your side, you can even see enjoy some people-watching at the concert or festival – which is sure to be wild – without feeling that uncomfortable pressure. Plus, who wouldn’t want some of their closest, sober friends to experience the music hit of the year with them?

3. Make a Plan

Making plans for situations you might encounter is always a smart move. By asking other sober, more seasoned show goers about their experiences, you are on the right track to having some good information about what to expect. You can get insight into the atmosphere of these events and understand what obstacles you might face: Lots of people at these shows will openly offer you drinks or drugs? You can plan for that and be ready to turn those offers down with a smile.

4. Drive Yourself To the Show

If you don’t have a car, plan an “escape route,” meaning someone who is able to come get you at a moments notice, even if it’s an Uber. Sometimes shows are overwhelming. As addicts and alcoholics in lifelong recovery, it is difficult to surround yourself in atmospheres of drugs and drinking – especially at a show or a festival where it’s pretty blatantly in your face. While not everyone is using and drinking like we once did, it is still a triggering place to be. It’s easy to get nostalgic or caught up in that euphoric recall of the “good times,” forgetting about all the pain that followed.

By driving yourself to the show, you are in control of just when you can leave and how you’re getting home. Furthermore, if you feel at any moment that you may want to drink or use drugs, walk out to the car for a breather. Most venues allow re-entry, and for those that don’t, taking a breather and walking around a less crowded area is definitely a big help.

5. Remembering the Show is Worth It

There is a huge difference between shows I saw while I was using and the shows I’ve seen sober. In the past, waking up was always filled with the dread of not knowing what I did, or where I was. More importantly, I didn’t remember half of the show. For concerts and festivals, the show is only half of the fun—it’s the entire experience!

Meeting new people in Wharf Rat groups, fellowshipping with strangers from across the country, and listening to beautiful music made by musical genuises is something that I wish everyone could get the chance to experience. For people in recovery, it is a very big task to attend an event like this and it can become extremely stressful. However, every show can offer a new experience and a new lease on life. Without drugs and alcohol chaining us in, we are free to go wherever we want!